Hi- I’m Tim. I’m the founder of Blendcredible and this is my story:
“when you pray be careful because you just might get what you ask for,”
I was 28, single and on a career track I’d been working towards for years. For me family was the coveted grail, you know? The reward to hard work and careful choice of that one person who would ‘fit’ my life in such a way we could build co-dependantly together.
We’d plan for children and watch our seeds grow to show the work and principles we’ve instilled in their psyches over the years. [skiiiirrrrt!!!]
Stop the dreamy music! – Now que life’s plan for my married life.
FFWD to my ‘now’ –
I’m a Stepdad to four children over two separate marriages. The first being a brilliant young man 8 years old and is now a thriving adult. The second (my current marriage) I would find myself Stepdad to three beautiful children and a biological father now to one son.
I’ll just pause here so you can finish shaking your heads at my ‘twice Stepdad’ marriage decision… no, – no it’s fine go ahead I understand, I’ll wait. loll
Okay so, four Stepchildren & two marriages later as a Stepdad in both marriages I’ve had a whole new outlook on life and its plans. But most of all, I’ve had a newfound respect and empathy for blended families.
I’ve been a Stepparent for all of my married life/s (yeah twice) and I’ve made enough mistakes for all of us combined. I’ve also learned a great deal because of my journey. My experiences as a Stepdad and upbringing have influenced me to become a voice for other Stepparents like me.
I’ve experienced being a stepfather in all the ways one could imagine. From experiences with a non-involved biological parent, stepping into the role after a biological parent has passed, and bringing my own child in as a stepchild, I’ve learned quite a bit about blended families.
I have four great kids in their teens- Olivia, Zion, Syrena, and Marques, all of whom came into my life in nontraditional ways except Zion (my only biological child).
My 1st Stepson who is now grown was and is still today a very large part of my growth as a Stepdad. Being a role model to our children, whether biological or stepchildren, isn’t always easy, but it’s so rewarding.
Let me discuss this now (because I realize that using the term “Step” is like kryptonite to some blended family parents). The memes are all over the place:
“The only thing ‘step’ in my house are the staircases,” etc…
I get all of that, and understand its meaning, in my home I refer to my Stepchildren as ‘my children’, ‘my son’, ‘my daughters’ and we are family. But when I speak, write, coach or guide I use the terms Step or Blended as they are easily identifiable when translated
I’m a Stepdad in theory but a very proud and grateful dad in the overall scheme of things, my role is ever present and I am clear on how to best navigate my children, my family and our home.