The self imposed pressure we add to ourselves is inSANE! Now add all these cute cliche’s, matching ensemble family photo’s and the seemingly incredibly well matched couples with the cutest kids ever and you’ve just increased this same pressure 100 fold.

Right here, right now, I’m going to need you to STOP IT!

Stop viewing others more capable than yourself of being the Step-Parent you were called to be in your own home.

Stop sabotaging that great idea or spontaneous desire to tickle your Stepchildren, write a quick note and post it on the wall, or make that special dinner – stop second guessing these beautiful sparks of engagement. Just do them!

Right here, right now, look at yourself in the mirror or grab that cell phone and flip that camera over so you can see what I see. A selfless, loving, huge spirited and caring person who loves their spouse so much that they’ve challenged themselves beyond what they’ve imagined married life would be.

Right here, right now, I commit my experiences to you, mistakes and all so that you don’t have to take this journey alone.

You ready? Let’s get it!

The post Right Here, Right Now! appeared first on Blendcredible.

I have, and truth is most Step Parents have found themselves in this very spot from time to time with no immediate support from their significant other.

It’s as though the entire family sees you but send’s an unspoken vibe that says;
‘You should be alright as we have this conversation ‘in your presence’ about ‘us’, and this household with no regard for your position.’

You should be alright as we have this conversation ‘in your presence’ about ‘us’, and this household with no regard for your position.

~the state of many Step-Parents during pivotal seasons in the home

Whether it’s money related, school related, major decisions regarding parental changes etc. conversations like these happen all over the world in Blended Family homes every day.

The first time I found myself in this position was 15 years ago standing in our kitchen after just coming in from work. The day was not particularly kind to me and I’d already settled the fact that the remainder of my day would not be much better.

Unfortunately the evening would prove my expectations correct as I found myself wanting to add a point of view to an already on-going conversation between my wife and her family regarding my Stepson.

Needless to say the feeling was depleting as I stood there waiting to be seen or even ‘asked’ what I thought about things.

If you should find yourself in this position try the following steps to avoid internal turmoil and resentment:

Monitor your ‘inner-voice’ – what you tell yourself is an internal fast track to your subconscious self. Be sure what you say falls in line with what’s positive about your situation and remember your spouse has your best interest at heart.

Put yourself in their shoes – viewing things from another perspective helps with reasoning, as well as empathy for what might not be such an easy topic or situation for the bio parent either. Doing a position change often times allows us to see the challenges our spouses or partners may be working to resolve and makes it easier to give them space to work things out.

Let them know how you feel – nothing wrong with opening up and simply ‘asking’ to be heard as well as letting your spouse or partner know how the situation makes you feel. Usually this conversation would take place after the fact but make no mistake about it ‘asking during the instance is okay as well’. Just be sure to take the conversational temperature before doing so as to not escalate an already potentially uncomfortable situation.

Don’t take it personally – I can’t stress this enough. The importance of keeping yourself safe from internalizing another persons situation is key if as a Step-Parent we are to remain healthy. It is difficult to live in the same home without identifying with the struggles that take place within that home. Identifying and internalizing are two different things. When we begin to internalize things they become ‘personal’ and this is often times where the resentment takes place. Yes, identify with your families situation just do so without taking the situation as your own and adding the weight of resolve to it.

Our functions are full of challenges and obstetrical instances that if not seen in the proper light have the potential to derail our purest intentions. Instead of seeing them as detractors in our relationships let’s use them as opportunities to grow, and tools to strengthen our unity.

The post Missing Persons appeared first on Blendcredible.

When I started Blendcredible, I did so from a place of purpose, a desire to add positive value to a community that until recently has been under appreciated, undernourished, underrated, and under the parental radar since the beginning of our ‘category’.

One year ago I created my 1st Instagram account.   I dedicated this account to Step Parents & Blended Families. The purpose of Blendcredible was and still is to add positive energy to our community.

Blendcredible’s core mission is to redesign the step-parenting narrative by encouragement, service, empathy and celebration.

Once I saw Blendcredible’s traction gain momentum, I took a personal inventory of my life, my motives and asked myself some hard questions.

If I was to serve the Step-parenting community to the degree, you deserve to be served I’d have to do so from the purest places of my experience.

That meant making sure my personal life as a Stepdad was in order (it was good but I needed it to be better than just ‘good’) I needed to sit and talk with my Wife, and our children.

I needed them to be okay with what was taking place regarding Blendcredible and all it could be.

I needed to make a few phone calls to some people I felt I’d not been the best partner to. Those areas were Music, Business, Personal and Self related.

I needed to give Blendcredible some space to breathe without me, to see if after sometime away the pulling in my gut to serve and build something like this was still there.

It was! But only this time I’d build it from a place of pure energy, demanding the best parts of me and everything that means.

I love being a Stepparent, I love serving YOU and your families. I value your decision to Step-up and face uncertainties for the sake of little humans who don’t have an obligation to call you ‘mom’ or ‘dad’. Yet the desire to treat them as your own ‘as much as is within you to do’ still rises to the forefront of your being.

THAT IS WHY I STARTED BLENDCREDIBLE!

If I would do this, it had to start with the purest of intent, the best of myself, and the deepest part’s of me. The Step-parenting community deserves nothing less, and I would offer nothing less than what my convictions were telling me you were worthy of.

So, please accept my apologies for the abrupt departure – I just needed to be sure what we build here together is founded on the purest of intent, the energy HAD to be right.

The motive HAD to be pure, and the brand MUST be built on the premise of service from the deepest parts of my experiences.

Blendcredible never died, it did however experience a ‘core check’ and a re-alignment. New Vision | New Chapter | Same Focus… Step Parents and Blended Families.

~ Tim Watson Blendcredible Founder & Fellow Step Parent.

I’m back and together you and I will change the Step-parenting narrative as we know it!

Thank you for believing in yourself enough to see the value in what Blendcredible can be to our community.

Here to Encourage, Inspire, & Celebrate With You

Tim Watson

The post Reset appeared first on Blendcredible.